Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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