He asked to "fluff my boner.."
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
