Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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