going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
