I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize