who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
