I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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