I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
high people should be assigned attendants
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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