We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You did what with his pubic hair?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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