we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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