This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
