Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
