omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
