Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
