at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
