I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize