Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize