So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
