You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
We're like a lot better than the average bears
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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