i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
