my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
