I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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