I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
