She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
