Can Purell be used as lube?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
