Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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