you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
