sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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