Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
