you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
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