Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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