I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
