I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
