I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
