You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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