your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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