i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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