So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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