maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
