kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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