You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
