and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
