you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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