did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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