You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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