If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize