Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
