awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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