that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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