also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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